The University of Cape Town (UCT) alumni has come out in support of the South African National Society (SANS) who have been granted permission to erect a six meter high statue of an Eastern Grey Squirrel on the plinth that until recently was home to a statue of the man who introduced the fury little critter from Europe to Cape Town at the turn of a more enlightened century.
In a televised announcement yesterday, the spokesperson for SANS, Dr. Stephanie Hofmeyer explained why it was so important to honour the European Tree Squirrel that has become a symbol of reconciliation in Cape Town’s Gardens where they outnumber the homeless and peanut sellers. “We sympathise with black students at UCT who have had to live with the previous colonial symbol on the campus and are proud to announce that their concerns have been at the forefront of our efforts to find a suitable replacement for the plinth.” Dr. Hofmeyer went on to say that the best part about the decision was that no-one could in all consciousness complain about a statue to an innocuous squirrel while simultaneously still paying homage to the illustrious achievements of a man like Dr. Rhodes who through his tireless efforts was solely responsible for the development of higher education throughout most of the country.
Political leaders from all of the major parties have also come out in support of this move and in a statement from the presidency that was read out by a formally unemployed family member, the ANC pays homage to the man who legitimized corruption and corporate greed. “If it was not for Baas Rhodes” said the said family member: “Africa would still be unexploited with no opportunities for self enrichment and foreign divestment.”
The renowned flake-artist and white-wash expert, Michael Elion who has been peddling his corporatized state-sponsored and entirely unoriginal drivel across the city of Cape Town since 2009, has unsurprisingly been commissioned to work on the erection of the new statue with a combined grant of R246 million which was made available through a partnership between Agriforum and the Mandela Rhodes Foundation.